A small update, because I keep seeing this blog in my list and wondering where on earth it's meant to go.
I haven't been productive with spirit/psychic art since the stream I held on the 3rd. In fact, I've been mainly practicing with tarot/oracle readings because I recently acquired new decks and wanted to get used to them and their energy.
I do know that I still want to work with spirit/psychic art. Actually, if my brother wasn't staying for the holidays, I'd be practicing aura paintings right now. However, his presence in the house disturbs the "flow" - especially because he's very nosy and likes to take up residence in my room unless I make it very obvious that I don't want him in here (and if I do that, then I just end up looking like the bitch sister who doesn't want to chill with her brother).
So what this means is that I won't have a decent chance to work on such readings until... I don't know. Maybe the summer, because I usually don't have that much motivation to read for people while I'm in school; all my free time is spent toward personal projects. I may be willing to do a few in between school projects and personal projects, but I can't speak for the future me.
Spirit/psychic art is still something I want to work with, though. I'm hoping that school and personal practice will help me develop a style worthy of such readings. Until then, I don't have much to take note of here. I might reflect on past portraits just for the sake of reminding myself where I'd like to be as someone who performs this manner of reading.
Maybe I might finally begin charging for these readings in 2013. Nothing too expensive, of course, but enough to help support myself. I need to start saving up so I can help shape the future that everything around me keeps alluding to.
I'm quite curious to see how my endeavors go this year...
Don't be confused by the title of this post; it's meant to reflect when I held the actual stream session. I completed six readings - one of which was an experiment. My interpreters and I were discussing the human qualities associated with the portraits I paint - how the human reflection may be unnecessary. To be honest, I see "guides" - or any other force with intent - first and foremost as blobs with primary and secondary color attributions that help me understand the intention of the energy. The "human" forms only further assist me in acquiring more detail, and ultimately, to help the sitter connect. I feel human faces help us with this connection, which is why many - if not all - spirit artists choose to create "portraits" of them. But can I create a "faceless" portrait that would still be effective in assisting the sitter with their connection? That's what I wanted to find out. Here's the result:
Now, this wasn't an ideal experiment, because the sitter was already familiar with her guide. Even I was, to some degree, because she always talks about him. She had already attached so many labels to him, so I tried to detach from her perspective and focused on what I felt his energy was like.
I have to admit - it was a bit challenging. I'm so used to expressing a guide's character through facial features. Eyes are one of the most important aspects of portraits because they can reveal so much. So not being able to reveal emotions or personality traits through facial expressions felt a little limiting. I found myself struggling, thinking, "How the hell am I supposed to describe this energy without a face?"
It's all about feeling. That's my biggest goal when I paint such portraits: I want my sitter to be able to feel their guide - not just see them. I want the portraits to give off a specific energy... the energy that I feel from them. That's why in actuality, I don't care much for "guises." Of course, I dressed my own guides up when I spent time with them, but all I really cared about was their energy and what they were here to assist me with.
So why do I paint human portraits to begin with? Because most people want that. Many of my sitters have no idea "who" their guides are, and expect a portrait that will help them establish a connection. And because of the human need for familiarity, connection is made stronger with the presence of human features.
However, according to my interpreters, the "faceless" portraits were preferred. Apparently, they felt that such portraits invited the viewer to use more of his/her imagination - rather than having the answers handed to them on a plate. I'm not sure how people utilize my art readings; therefore, I'm not sure whether my sitters have continued to visualize their guides (or higher aspects) as I painted them. If that's the case - well - I feel a bit guilty. You might wonder why, but see... I feel the guide relationship is very personal. It's based on you and your perspective. Not mine. I do give a disclaimer to my sitters, saying that this is my interpretation and is in no way meant to represent an "ultimate," but I still don't know if they take these words to heart.
All in all, I may be interested in experimenting more with these "faceless" portraits. I do like them because they align more with my personal view of guiding energies, but at the same time, they are a bit challenging. I do accept the challenge though, because that'll help me grow as an artist.
Now on to the next...
Don't be fooled - this isn't a "woman." This is actually a higher aspect representation of a male - quite possibly one of the sweetest gentlemen I've had the pleasure of knowing on Spiritual Forums. His energy is probably the most pleasant out of all males I've spoken with over there. He's respectful, sensitive, polite, humble, and just plain kind. So yes - there's an emphasis on feminine energy here. I think it's beautiful. I have deep respect for a man who embraces the feminine. He doesn't have to be a fanatic about it, of course.
To be honest, I'm not 100% satisfied with the technical aspects of this portrait; however, as I mentioned above, I focus primarily on the energy, so it's not a huge deal to me. I feel I successfully expressed what I wanted to express... the grace, the sensitivity, the humility.
This energy came through as a powerful "masculine" female. I say "masculine" because she was very fiery, and was associated with solar energy. Very much in charge and in control. I don't have much to say on this one other than that my interpreters picked up on her vigor and vitality, which equals success for me.
Gotta love the fiery females.
The sitter did admit that he hadn't sensed this energy around him before, but that he would try to connect. I'm curious to see if he has any success with her.
Every once in a while, I'll come across a user with a specific username that corresponds to the guide energy who comes through. The sitter who received this portrait had "pixie" in her username... and oddly enough, that's what came through. I know some skeptics out there are saying to themselves: "Then that's not spectacular. You only came up with something based on their username."
Yeah, you could see it that way if you want to be a skeptic about it. But after doing over one hundred of these readings, I've come to notice a pattern - that guides or guiding energies usually have associations with our interests and passions. And for good reason - because they're guides. It's part of the job description. Plus, those associations are what help people connect with their energy.
What's interesting about this portrait, though, is that the sitter told me the female energy depicted here looked strikingly like one of her family members. She also mentioned that she never would've expected this energy, because she was predominantly surrounded by male energies. However, she realized for herself that perhaps that's the reason a female came through - to help her connect with her feminine energy.
This one was fun. Occasionally, I'll come across an energy who is sly and mysterious, who likes to be elusive and lurk in the background. This was one of those energies. According to the sitter, she had been having difficulty making contact with her main guide. Once I tuned in, I understood why: because this energy was one of those "elusive" types. Cunning, wise, lurking in the murky forests... yet still striking.
Not much else to say on this one, though, other than the sitter seemed to resonate with her.
I also completed an intuitive reading during this session, but due to the nature of the content, I deliberately chose to refrain from discussing/showing it to respect the sitter's privacy and boundaries. It's not that bad, but it's not fluffy and cheery, either. However, it did make sense to the sitter, so I'm happy.
Evaah
Been feeling a bit uncertain about this whole spirit/psychic art thing recently, because it seems like every time I sit down to do a reading, it feels like work. On my personal blog, I mentioned that I suspect this has to do with attending school and having no free time. Because as much as I love to help people in this way, I would still prefer spending my free time working on personal writing and artwork, because I rarely get much time to focus on it while I'm busy with classes and whatnot.
I can't determine whether spirit/psychic art is something I'll continue to do years into the future. I can't speak for my future self. I can only speak for my present self, and my present self has so much she'd like to be doing right now. But of course, I'm in the midst of attending school so I can receive a degree and secure myself a stable job so that I can sustain myself with decent income.
I'm thinking that perhaps I'm not meant to be focusing on spirit/psychic art right now. When I examine my desires, I realize that one of the biggest reasons I'm doing it is to keep up a reputation, or at least construct one so that I can attract potential clients for the near future. In other words, I'm focusing on the financial aspect of it. After all, how am I supposed to sustain myself if I don't receive something in return for the energy I give?
I've been making a semi-fervent effort. I made a tumblr dedicated to my art for a little extra exposure, but it has attracted very little attention, despite me trying to promote it on my main blog. Perhaps it's because most people on tumblr - even those who are into spirituality - aren't looking for that kind of thing. I also made this blog as a means of documenting my progress and getting my name out there. But by doing so, all I'm really focusing on is the financial aspect of this service. Am I to blame? No. I need to be able to sustain myself. I mean, I have parents who are freaking out that I won't be able to take care of myself when they leave to go live overseas. My writing will take a long while to perfect, even if my ideas stop changing. So I need something that will help me live from now until the time I can get published.
That's where spirit/psychic art comes in - or so I was hoping. But if I can hardly muster up the motivation for it now, what am I supposed to do?
I'm thinking that perhaps I should take some time off from it. If anything, I should trust the universe to deliver that which I need for this life at the perfect time. Maybe spirit/psychic art is a temporary thing. Maybe it'll be something that returns in the future, after I've had much more drawing experience.
I often wonder why I feel so uncreative and unoriginal, and then I realized: my problem is that every creative thing I do is fueled by thoughts of having to turn it into something lucrative. I have to worry about skill, talent, creative perfection, competition, survival, and whether I can make a career out of what it is I do. I have no room to just enjoy the act of creating art, despite it being my passion. I have to turn that passion - the fire that fuels my existence - into something that helps protect the very same system that I'm fighting against.
Man, this society is messed up. But that's not the point of this post.
I'm probably going to set spirit/psychic art aside for a while, and focus on my own personal work. I already mentioned earlier today in my personal blog that I'm going to start focusing on creating art for the sake of creating something beautiful. Because by thinking about the financial aspect of art, I'm putting limits on myself, and these limits are preventing me from accessing my true creative power.
So no more limits.
As for this blog... I'll continue to update it, but it'll probably be based on past readings or tips for other spirit/psychic artists. We'll see.
Evaah
