I haven't been doing them. And as much as I would love to get back into doing them, I don't have the motivation right now. School is playing a big role in this. But it seems at the current moment, I'm meant to be focused on other creative things right now.
I'm hoping that the desire will return. I'd like to think that my technical drawing skills are improving, so when I finally do start doing these again, I'll be more proud of them. I was looking through my folders earlier to find an accompanying artwork for this post, and it made me miss the process.
I realized something, though: the best results come when I'm working with people I'm close to and/or are interested in. As you can imagine, I receive a lot of requests when I announce I'm opening up slots. And a good majority of those requests are from people who just want to snag some free answers from me or want the work done for them (mainly referring to spirit portraits). I guess what I'm saying is that most of these people don't want to work hard to make any progress, and assume that they can make a nice request and get all the answers on a plate.
That's why I secretly love when they get a reading which they can't immediately understand. Because then they have to sit down and actually connect with it - interpret its meaning for themselves.
I'm not saying this to be mean. But what one has to understand is that all my life, I've been offering these for free. I recently came across a post on tumblr that pretty much said in a nutshell: tarot readers who read for free have an obligation to their "clients," and should provide information on the status of their reading whenever possible.
As much as I love to keep my sitters informed, I have to disagree. And that's for tarot reading. As a card reader myself, I know how much energy it takes to sit down, focus on the sitter's question(s), draw cards (I pick them intuitively; I don't shuffle and deal) for each question, contemplate their meanings, and then finally type it all up. And the disappointing part? More often than not, I'll type up this whole big fat reading, only to receive about a sentence of feedback, or a mere "Thanks."
All about compassion, I guess. Helping each other out.
Spirit art can go either way. It's hard to say whether art takes more energy than tarot reading. For instance, guide portraits don't take that much out of me because they're easiest for me to do, but if the sitter doesn't attend a livestream, then I have to spend about 30 minutes on the painting, then move on to type up a description about the energy in as much detail as possible (because almost always, the question arises: "can you tell me more?"). And because most people who make these requests are unfamiliar with their guides, I'll get one main response: "I don't know who this is but I love the painting."
Aura readings are on par with tarot. I have to focus on the individual, and then, one at a time, in a clockwise motion, paint each color I see, and the details of the aura, only to then sit down and write in-depth on what the colors mean and how their positions relate to those meanings.
But I digress.
It's a shame that I made this blog only to pretty much abandon it after a month. This would've been most beneficial about a year ago, when I was on a roll with readings. At the time, though, I wasn't that interested in blogging. Just know that I haven't completely strayed from spirit and psychic art. School's eating me alive, and it seems life has me focused more on my own creative projects right now. My senses are dull, anyway. It would take a lot of work to return to the level I once was, when I could connect immediately.
One day, though. I'm hoping that summer will bring me a bit of motivation, but right now, it's difficult to tell. It'll happen when it's meant to, I suppose.
